Tag Archive: leadership

Our New Blog Site!

 

Hi there, and thanks for checking out our website!

We wanted to let you know that we have a brand new location for our blog – it’s now over on the Medium platform (Click HERE), and you can find all the latest articles from us (and other writers who we’ve approved) there.

At The Whiteboard continues to be the place to find information that will help you “Crush It At Work.” This page, on our website, contains all our archived blogs back to the very beginning (June 2012!!!). If you’re looking for our latest and greatest work, however, you need to click HERE.

  • Are you a front-line employee trying to figure out how to make improvements in what you do every day, how to be an amazing team member, how to move up in an organization, or how to build amazing relationships at work?
  • Maybe you’re a manager, trying to be amazing at your job. You’d like to improve business processes, learn how to engage your team, inspire them, coach them (ugh, what does THAT even mean?), talk to them even when it’s tough, make changes that stick, or just be “that manager” that people remember (in a good way) forever.
  • Are you a Senior Leader who wishes their team would “think more strategically” but don’t know how to explain that to them? Do you have communication issues, culture issues, and change management issues? If I asked you to explain change management to me in 25 words or less, could you? Are you trying to improve efficiency, save money, or make your customers happier? Why? How do you know there’s a problem?

If so, then our publication is for you. Search this page for our oldies-but-goodies, or click HERE to see the latest and greatest.

Thanks for reading!

Being A Great Boss (Free Webinar!!!!)

I know this photo has nothing to do with webinars, but it portrays excitement! And I’m excited! (Photo by Social Cut on Unsplash)

The Unicorn of All Training Topics

Regular readers will know I teach a lot, and one of the more popular topics I cover is called Management Essentials.

Not a very catchy title, I know, but it’s not my course — I just deliver the materials.

Anyway, participants love this course; not only is it eye-opening for them (you mean manager’s have to do ALL THAT plus help me get my work done?), but it also helps them think about whether they really have it in them to manage other people, or what they need to do next to up their management skills.

We talk about what it is to be a manager or a leader or — the unicorn in business — a Leader-Manager.

We discuss the right and wrong ways to engage people, why coaching is key, what incivility is and why it’s ruining the workplace today, time management and prioritization skills, and perhaps most importantly, how self-awareness is one of the most important characteristics of a Leader-Manager.

During the course I think I’ve been asked 99 times, “What kind of training do people get when they become managers for the first time?”

Bless.

The thing is, it’s a rare (and wonderful) organization that has training for people when they become new managers.

Some organizations have Leadership Development programs, and often those are for a select few people who have been identified as having “high potential.”

So how are people supposed to learn to be good managers and to develop that potential if no one will train them?

Which brings us to this webinar.

This is a free one-hour taste of our Being A Great Boss course.

Yes it’s free, and yes it’s only one-hour, but I promise it is packed with as much content as I can in that amount of time. I will also have free templates and resources for you.

And yes, there will be an opportunity to learn more about the full self-directed, six-week online course which will be offered this fall.

Who Should Attend This Webinar?

  • Brand new managers who wish there was a course on how to be the kind of boss everyone wants to work for.
  • People who think they’d like to become a manager, and who want to sharpen up their skills to increase their chances of landing that dream job.
  • Existing managers who would just like to be better.

Is this you? You can sign up for it by CLICKING HERE— it’s super quick and easy, and you don’t need to download any software or give a credit card.


What You Will Learn

  • How To Get Recognized (And Promoted) In Your Organization. Most organizations want someone who can get the job done. That’s a manager. Most employees want to work for someone who inspires them and makes them feel good about their work. That’s a leader. Learn how to stand out in your organization by being BOTH, and up your chances of a promotion.
  • How to Get People To Want To Do A Great Job Just Because They Want You To Look Good. The #1 tool in your “Manager Toolbox” is understanding your own personal habits and preferences, and recognizing how they impact your ability to inspire and communicate with other people.
  • How To Get Someone To Say What You’d Rather Just Tell Them.Learning to coach was a career-changer for me, and I’ll share how it can be for you too.
  • Tools, Tips, and Cheat Sheets. You’ll get easy-to-use downloadable templates to help you remember and use what you learn.
  • I’ll Also Answer Your Questions Live. This is not a pre-recorded training. Join me live on August 27th and I’ll answer your questions throughout the presentation. Whether you’re just starting out or you’ve been managing people for years, I’ll show you how to use a few simple tools to turn your manager style into a leader-manager style!

You can sign up for it by CLICKING HERE


Important Details

  • It’s August 27th at 12 noon Eastern Daylight Time.
  • It’s one hour.
  • You will get a ton of excellent content, and some free templates and tools to take away and start using right away.

Can’t Attend But Wish You Could?

That’s ok!

Sign up anyway, and I’ll send you the recorded webinar after it’s over.

Easy peasy.

You can sign up for it by CLICKING HERE


Hope to see you there!

Ruth.

On-boarding (A Manager’s Guide to Welcoming New Employees)

Season Three B, Episode Four. Podcast recap! (And if you missed the podcast, you can find it here.)

Podcast Recap: Season 3b, Episode 4

In this week’s podcast we focused on tips for managers to impress the heck out of their new employee by having the most awesome and fantastic on-boarding program ever. I mean, ever.

It’s really not hard, and because it’s sometimes easier to start from the negative,

Here’s What Not to Do

Be unprepared.

That’s all. Just don’t do that.

Here’s What to Do

It may be a while since you were new on your job. Plus, you’re a manager and may not exactly know what your team feels would make a rookie feel part of the team. Remember, not only are you responsible for attracting and recruiting talent, but also for making them want to stay and be productive! If they don’t feel welcome, they may bounce pretty quickly.

So, one of the smartest things you can do is to ask your current employees to brainstorm and create an on-boarding plan – they will certainly know the good and the bad of your first day on the job, and they will want to ensure the “new guy/girl” wants to stay!

This collection of ideas should be written into some kind of process or standard operating procedure that can be triggered as soon as a new employee’s start date is made public. Remember, the goal is to make this person feel valued and special – like they are kind of a big deal.

The Steps for Amazing On-boarding

  1. Create a checklist for welcoming a new employee. Use your team to ensure it’s realistic and awesome and fun.
    • Assign a role to “owning” the checklist. (It’s important that you assign a role, not a person. If you assign this to Bob, then Bob may own it forever, no matter how many times he changes roles.)
  2. Ensure the checklist includes:
    • A buddy. There is NOTHING as good as being assigned a buddy to help you navigate the ropes. If you have nothing else in your on-boarding program, have this.
    • A schedule for the first 5-7 days, that’s designed to slowly integrate the new person into the routine. (Pretend you are a “Cruise Director,” and you’re planning the week to be productive and also have time to recover from information overload.) This would include a meeting with HR to sign papers or security to get keys or pass cards.
    • Somewhere to sit, and all the required trappings – computer, phone (either desktop or company-assigned smart phone), chair, basic stationery supplies. Oh and a nameplate, with their name spelled properly.
    • A printed list of login information for any required systems.
    • A link to “required reading.”
      • Organizational Chart (with or without photos of people)
      • List of acronyms
      • On-boarding manual specific to the team
        • Where to find answers to common questions
          • Dress code
          • Corporate policies
          • Travel policies
          • Expense policies
          • Attendance / Illness / Vacation Policies
          • Internal team processes
          • Emergency processes
          • Processes for Flexible work
            • VPN
            • Expectations for hours work, being available, etc
        • Who does what on the team
    • A meeting with you, their new manager, on Day One. This is your chance to:
      • Learn how they like to be managed, recognized, encouraged.
      • Follow up on information gleaned during the interview.
      • Set expectations.
        • No, I don’t expect you to “hit the ground running.”
        • Yes, I do expect you to get up to speed gradually.
        • Yes, I know you’ll have lots of questions, and if your buddy can’t help you, come and see me.
        • Come and see me even if you don’t have questions.
        • Yes, you’ll have a performance plan and a learning plan, but let’s talk about that in a week or two, after you get settled.
        • Yes, I check in with my team regularly – here’s when and what I expect during those check-ins.
    • A formal, scheduled 30-day check in with you to ensure that their expectations have been met in their new job. You should also check in at a week, and even two weeks – it’s critical you have a formal meeting at 30/60/90 days – this is important to retaining the talent you just hired.

These days it is much easier than it used to be (even perhaps expected) to switch jobs if they don’t fulfill you and meet your expectations. Taking the time to make sure the new employee’s first day/week/month/quarter is AMAZING, will make it much less likely that all the work you did to hire someone will be wasted when they leave quickly.

Create the plan. Do the plan. Make the person feel like a rockstar. 

Until next time,

Ruth.

 

How to Be Productive When the Office is Quiet

Season Two, Episode Eight. Podcast recap! (And if you missed the podcast, you can find it here.)

Podcast Recap: Season 2, Episode 8, BONUS PODCAST

This week on the podcast, which is our special Holiday Bonus Podcast, we talk about how to be productive when the office is technically open, but mostly pretty dead.

Unless you are an essential services worker (and if you are, thank you!), or are super lucky and work for an organization that closes between Christmas and New Year’s, you have probably experienced working those days when MOST people are on vacation, but a skeleton staff remains.

It’s the worst.

You’re there because the organization has to keep the lights on and do the basics to make sure nothing horrible goes wrong, which it almost never does, but you know, just in case and all that.

What do you do? There’s no one to have meetings with. You can’t get anything approved to move forward. Your desk is out in the open, so watching a movie or playing Candy Crush is unwise.

What Do You Do?

P-O-U-N-C-E

That’s right, Pounce. It’s our mnemonic gift to you to help you on those days when you are in the office, but barely anyone else is.

(It’s also helpful if you think about it as setting yourself up for the New Year. You know, pouncing on it. See what we did there?)

  • Ponder
  • Organize
  • Unsubscribe
  • Network
  • Chill
  • Enjoy

Ponder

Take some time to think about where you are right now, and whether you’re happy with it. This isn’t about making resolutions, although you might end up making some. It’s more about reflecting and doing a little self- assessment:

  • What do you want to do with your job? Are you on the right road to making it happen?
  • How’s your health?
  • How are your relationships, both at home and at work?
  • Are you at loose ends? Are you “all good?”
  • Do you have any “to do list” items that you’d like to check off your Bucket List this year?

We are HUGE fans of the Self Journal from the Best Self Company. (You can buy them from their website or from Amazon.) It’s easy to use, and helps you set up your goals and what those tasks are that will help you achieve them. It even has a handy dandy poster to track your goals three months at a time (which is much less daunting than planning for a whole year), and gives you little wins to help build your motivation.

CONTEST ALERT!

In fact – we love it so much that we’re going to give one away! Just send us an email (info@whiteboardconsulting.ca) or tweet us (@whiteboardcons) to tell us what your favourite podcast of ours was from 2017, and why. That’s it! We will make a draw on January 15th and send one to you.

Organize

Times like these are also excellent times to organize your workspace. This works for everyone, even people who THINK they are organized all the time – come on be honest. You have binders there from that conference you went to two years ago that you haven’t looked at. Or you have confidential files that should probably be shredded or returned to the HR department. Or you have notes on a printed PowerPoint presentation that really isn’t helpful anymore (or it is, but only page 68). Toss it (except page 68 – take a photo of it before you toss it). Or you have a junk drawer full of old candies, paper clips, and expired emergency deodorant.

Take the time to remove all these things that clutter your desk and act as distractions.

Unsubscribe

Hitting delete is pretty easy, but it’s a temporary fix to an on-going email clutter situation.

Take 20 minutes to open those things you subscribed to or that you have no idea why you get, and unsubscribe from them. We aren’t here to talk about email habits and changing the way you manage your Inbox. We ARE here to advise you to clean out the crap because it’s distracting you and stressing you out and you don’t even know it.

We like a couple of helpful tools:

  • Unroll Me is an amazingly helpful online tool that scans your Inbox periodically and, when a subscription email shows up, offers you a few options:
    • Unsubscribe – AND THEY THEN UNSUBSCRIBE FOR YOU SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING,
    • Roll It Up to a daily email with all your subscriptions in one scrollable email, or
    • Leave it in your Inbox.
  • SaneBox is also an online tool that moves your email into folders that you define. If you take the time to set it up the right way, it means that when you open your regular Inbox, you only see the most important things. No scrolling, filtering, or distracting. SO HELPFUL

Network

This is the perfect time to connect and build relationships. Ask that new person to walk with you and get a Peppermint Mocha or gingerbread cookie. Talk to that one co-worker that you have been having trouble getting to know.

If you’re a manager, reach out to members of your team who are all in during these “between” days, and suggest you all go out for lunch together. (And no, you don’t have to pick up the tab, although it would be nice if you gave the OK to extend the lunch hour a bit.)

This is not about socializing with your work buddies or BFFs. This is about capitalizing on the opportunity to build critical relationships in the office. It’s also just plain nice.

Chill

Cut yourself some slack. Catch that later bus (as long as work allows you to be flexible with your hours). Put on some music while you sort out your desk. Take a few minutes to stare out the window and reflect or ponder or just people watch.

If you’re a manager, cut your team some slack! We know of managers who used to just send people home a bit early, or extend lunch hours to allow for holiday shopping. It doesn’t have to be huge, but wow it can give people some stress free time to get things done. And that goes a long way.

Most importantly though, focus on yourself and what you need in order to rejuvenate over this holiday time. (This relates, of course, to the Pondering activity!)

Enjoy!

Finally, enjoy yourself. Find some source of joy that works for you, whether you are celebrating holidays or not. Whether it’s helping someone else out, taking some time to work on that special project that you love but just isn’t normally a priority, treating yourself to some special food, or wearing an Ugly Holiday Sweater, there are things out there that are fun and festive.

Oh, and Get Your Work Done Too

Of course you have to get your work done. Hopefully the demands are somewhat less, and you can take the time to set yourself up so you can POUNCE on the New Year.

We’d love to hear how you use POUNCE! And of course don’t forget to send us a note or a tweet to enter the Self Journal contest.

We wish you the very best for the New Year, and look forward to bringing you our third podcast series which will focus on your career! How to manage it, how to change it, and how to get where you want to go. And if you’re a manager, we will have tips on how to help your team manage their careers, and how to run a successful interview too.

Don’t forget you can subscribe to our podcast in iTunes (click here) so you never miss a new episode!

Until next time,

Ruth & Nicole

Peter. You’re Fired.

Season Two, Episode Seven. Podcast recap! (And if you missed the podcast, you can find it here.)

Podcast Recap: Season 2, Episode 7

This week on the podcast, which is our final episode of Season 2, we talk about things you should consider when you need to fire someone, either from their job or contract, from a project, or from, well, anything really.

Please note that we are NOT HR professionals or lawyers, so in our podcast and in this blog, we are focused more on the emotional burden of firing someone vs. the legal and technical logistics. Often, organizations have people to help with this and make sure that no one gets in trouble or does something horribly wrong. There is definitely due process that is required, and if you find yourself needing to fire someone, you need to ensure you’ve reached out to the right people before you actually say the words.

Like all things that are new or challenging, firing someone in the most effective and sensitive way requires some preparation. In addition to reaching out to your employment lawyer and/or your HR department, you might consider:

Before the Conversation

  • Have you given the person a chance to improve?
    • If you’re firing someone because of poor performance, you need to be able to show that you’ve been clear with your expectations, you’ve had regular performance conversations, and you’ve actually given the person a chance to improve.
    • Remember that the onus is on you to hold regular performance management conversations so that really, this isn’t a surprise to anyone. (Except those who may be deliberately obtuse.)
  • Have you documented your conversations?
    • Of course as part of a formal due process there are verbal warnings and written warnings and all kinds of documentation. We also recommend that you keep your own private and more casual notes on your discussions and important events. This can be used as evidence of your efforts to help the employee improve, your conversations, their reactions, etc.
  • Have you planned what you’re going to say?
    • Consider the ASBI tool so that you can open well, state the issue, and then BE QUIET. The temptation is to keep talking and fill the silence, and that just doesn’t help anyone (and could dig you into a hole).
    • Be firm and kind. If you’re over emotional, you risk the conversation going sideways and losing control of what is happening. If you’re unemotional, you risk sounding like a cold hearted robot.
    • If you’re firing someone because of a poor fit (vs. for poor performance), all the same preparation applies. Have you given them a fair chance to fit in? Have you chatted with them and coached them to allow them to adjust? Have you planned how you’re going to say what you need to say?

During the Conversation

Think about having a mantra to use if you get a bunch of questions or arguments against the termination. You might consider:

  • I appreciate this is a difficult or frustrating thing to happen. As I stated, you are being released from this position, and here are the next steps…
  • I appreciate your perspectives, and here is what is happening…
  • I know this is upsetting. Here is what you can expect next…

Picking a mantra that is true, does not apologize, and does not admit to any mistakes, is critical. It allows you to repeat the message over and over as the person tries to process what’s going on. Remember, this conversation is not a debate.

After the Conversation

Follow up. It might be with the person or with HR or with a variety of other people. Ensure that the proper next steps have been taken – leaving it up to chance or process is a recipe for confusion and, if things don’t happen in the right way (for instance, owed pay is not issued), it makes a bad situation worse, and makes you look terrible.

Our Three Tips

  1. Prepare Prepare Prepare:
    • Before the conversation – document and give them a chance to improve or fit in
    • During the conversation – have a mantra to stay on course and avoid a debate
    • After the conversation – follow up on the promised next steps, and do a little self assessment of how it went and lessons learned
  2. Use ASBI with Just the Right Amount of Emotion
    • Open Well
    • Be Firm but Kind
    • Don’t Fill the Silence
  3. Deal with Dissention
    • Stick to the Talking Points
    • Refuse to Debate
    • Use Your Mantra

This may be the hardest of our Difficult Conversations – after all, we are talking about someone’s livlihood! Do your homework so you can get it as right as possible the very first time! Likely you will think back and wish you had done something differently. And that’s ok.

No No Nancy Strikes Again

Season Two, Episode Six. Podcast recap! (And if you missed the podcast, you can find it here.)

Podcast Recap: Season 2, Episode 6

Every Office Has One

This week on the podcast we tackle that one person in the office that makes everyone groan. No, not Peter with all his horrible Dad jokes. No, we gave Peter the week off.  Instead we are talking about “No No Nancy”.  She’s negative. She hates change. She’s a downer. She doesn’t like new things.  She doesn’t even like old things.  She definitely doesn’t like you.  She says “No” a lot  – and her behaviour is a drag.

As always, our guiding principle here at Whiteboard is to seek to understand, so we should probably start with trying to uncover why some people have that negative style and others don’t.

Is the negativity a result of  personality preferences?

According to Myers-Briggs theory, people with a preference for Sensing (S) typically need factual, real, observable data in order for them to consider it trustworthy information.  Their personality opposites, those with a preference for Intuition (N), tend to trust information on the big picture and possibilities.

When our big picture thinkers (N) bring ideas/concepts/changes to our fact folks (S), the latter typically respond with a barrage of questions. These questions, used simply to get more data, information, and facts, are commonly interpreted by N’s as REALLY NITPICKY AND NEGATIVE: What’s the cost per night? Whats the weather that time of year? What was the data from last year? etc etc.

They aren’t meant to be negative, but that’s how they sound to their counterparts. As Ruth, Whiteboard’s resident S says, it’s “No for now, until you can prove otherwise”.

Similarly – S’s might start off proposals for change and meet with a similar perception of negativity from their N counterparts: What’s the big picture? How does this link to the strategy? Have you thought of other ideas? etc. And the perception is the same – a negative response that is a huge drag.

How to Deal?

If you’ve identified your No No or Negative Nancy as someone who just needs more data, BRING MORE DATA. As I (Nicole) mentioned, I deal with my seemingly super nitpicky, annoying husband who loves facts, data, and observations (love you babe) by always bringing facts and data with my ideas about which I want him to make decisions.  You know, like spreadsheets of vacation options with a zillion columns.

If you are the data driven realist trying to appeal to a big picture seeking N, can you give some thought to strategy and future possibilities to accompany your data and appeal to their thinking style?

This is all fine and dandy – but what if this isn’t a personality issue because there seems to be more going on?  Is it possible Nancy’s No’s are the result of some past experiences that are triggering a negative behaviour response? Or said differently…..

Once Bitten, Twice Shy

So this particular negativity comes from people who are impacted by past history/experience. Now the big question is how do we differentiate between the two sources of negativity, and more importantly does it matter? Let’s use Neville (Ruth’s Harry Potter obsession is really taking over…) as an example.

Every time Neville hears about a project he rolls his eyes, mutters under his breath, and is just generally grumbly.  Is he just being difficult because of past experience? Is he looking for the data? How can we find out?

Use open ended statements like:

Tell me more…..Help me understand…

to “peel back the layers of the onion” and find out.

You might hear:

  • I don’t understand it.
  • I don’t see the logic.
  • I don’t see the research.

Tell me about a time when this did work?

This is an Appreciative Inquiry technique that helps people focus on the art of the possible.

Either you’ll hear some positive ideas that you can work with, or, you might hear:

  • This always happens.
  • This never works.
  • I’m tired of all this.

This sounds like change fatigue, or previous examples of change that haven’t worked well or caused some workflow issues.

In this case you might want to find out where the person is in their journey for change? Maybe set some expectations about your topic.

But wait there’s more (like a great infomercial).

What if you hear:

  • I’m really mad about [insert unreasonable scenario that no one should be mad about here].
  • I can’t stand [insert really nice person who seems to just be driving Neville nuts].
  • Can you believe [insert really normal story that shouldn’t be alarming at all].

Sounds like maybe this is just a case of the MONDAYS. Sounds like this is just a grumpy day and will probably pass. Might be a good day to let someone just vent and be grouchy and not worry about this type of negativity bringing down the office culture too drastically.

BESPOKE COACHING

At the end of the day. Who’s on the “Bus to Change” with you? Who’s slashing the tires? Who’s grumpy in the back? And who’s gleefully singing songs at the front of the bus?

Deal with your negative Nancy’s/Neville’s/Nanette’s in respective order to their potential damage to your bus destination.  Before you come to a solution:

  1. Seek to understand,
  2. Then give info (if required), and/0r
  3. Then coach, and/or
  4. Give advice/support, and finally, if all else fails:
  5. Be directive.

The moral of this episode is….just because the symptoms sound the same (negativity), doesn’t mean the solution is the same.

You have to investigate and find the source of the negativity in order to deal with it effectively.  Listen to the podcast for Ruth’s Dog Bark/Tail analogy.

Next week on the blog we fire Peter.  Well not exactly – but we tell you what firing Peter might be like and how to prepare.

And we give you a sneak peek on Season 3 of the podcast! So keep on listening.

Until next time….

Nicole

 

How to Tell Peter He Smells

Season Two, Episode Three. Podcast recap! (And if you missed the podcast, click here.)

AWK-WARD….

Phil Collins, in case you’re too young to know who this is. Also click here to listen to SUSSUDIO.

This season on the podcast we’ve been focusing on awkward/difficult/uncomfortable conversations and helping everyone to get over their fears and just DO IT.  Now I believe that all difficult conversations are to some extent awkward, otherwise they’d just be conversations.

In case you don’t have time to listen to Ruth and my hilarious banter about body odour and low cut tops, this blog will give you three quick tips to having a conversation about a super uncomfortable topic.

(But you should listen, because otherwise the Phil Collins reference makes no sense.)

What Kinds of Conversations are we Talking About Here?

We’re talking about uncomfortable conversations like:

  • body odour,
  • bad breath,
  • food odours, or
  • work attire.

And to some, these might be no more difficult or awkward than not getting a promotion, not getting a pay raise, or just giving feedback.

Some of these are most difficult because they are subjective….what is “bad” body odour, what food smells “bad” versus not bad, what constitutes “appropriate” work attire.  They are also difficult because they are personal – it’s happening to your body, it’s on your body, or you’re putting it in your body. The reactions to this type of feedback can sometimes be more emotional and defensive and that can make having these types of conversations that much scarier.

3 Tips for Having Awkward Conversations

1. Prepare & Map it Out

We talked about this last on the podcast, but I’m going to add it here.  Do some prep work with your HR department, your corporate policies, or the good old interwebs.  Check out what current policies and labour laws are for the item you are approaching your colleague about.

Create a process map or decision tree of your conversation.  This helps you plan for reactions that you aren’t prepared for.  What if the recipient denies that they actually smell? What if the recipient bursts into tears? What if they get angry and walk out of the room? So your conversation process map might be as simple as this:

Opening: I have something awkward to tell you involving body odour.

Response:

  1. No I don’t smell.  You have no idea what you are talking about.
  2. OMG, really? I had no idea?
  3. Crying/Leave room/Somehow end conversation

Responses:

  1. Here’s what I’ve observed, others have described. Here are the impacts to the team/me/others.  What are your thoughts?
  2.  Same as above
  3.  Reschedule meeting and try again

And you can keep going down the line, what are possible responses to those….and what are your responses.

2.  Open Well

One of the greatest openings for this type of conversation is just laying it out there. “This is going to be a difficult conversation”.  This is such a lifesaver.  It sets the other person up to prepare for something awkward. It gives you, as the conversation leader a little bit of a pass on being “perfect”.  It eliminates the need for any pleasantries or diverting from the topic.  It prevents you from starting with distracting comments like “We know you are really great, we love your work, how was your weekend…..”.  You can move right to the meat of the conversation.

3. Follow-Up

Once it is over, make sure that you check in after this tough conversation and see how it is going.  Is the behaviour changing? Is it staying the same? Why?  You might need to have a second (or third or fourth) conversation before the impact really sinks in.

Awkward conversations are hard. With planning and practice they can become less difficult for everyone involved.

Give these tips a try, let us know how it went on Twitter at @whiteboardcons and check out the rest of our podcast series on our homepage at www.whiteboardconsulting.ca.

Until Next Time,

Nicole

 

 

 

How to Tell Peter, “No Raise for You”

Season Two, Episode Two. Podcast recap! (And if you missed the podcast, you can find it here.)

Podcast Recap: Season 2, Episode 2

This episode we focused on telling poor imaginary Peter that he didn’t get that raise he was expecting. “No raise for you Peter!”

Why is it so hard? It should be pretty logical, right? Wellll, not always.

It’s a Touchy Subject

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs tells us why the issue of pay raises, salaries, or compensation of any kind is especially difficult to address with people.

A person’s total compensation package is highly personal and strikes right at the heart of an individual’s ability not only to provide physiological needs for him/herself and his/her family, but also to build their own self-esteem, and to feel valued and worthwhile.

Essentially, you are impacting a person’s most basic and psychological needs.

It’s for this reason that you have to tread lightly when responding to someone who is angry about money. As you can imagine though, we strongly suggest you DO have that conversation. Why?

So many reasons.

  1. It’s respectful.
  2. It engages people.
  3. It builds your trusting relationship with that person.
  4. It sets expectations for the future.
  5. It’s just the right thing to do.

Peter Didn’t Get the Raise He Expected

Yup, back to poor Peter. In our last blog we focused on how to give Peter impactful (and kind) feedback about the quality of his work. Now we are faced with telling Peter that he is not getting the raise he wanted, either because he suddenly stormed into your office to discuss it, or because it’s part of your yearly salary or performance management conversation.

So what do you do?

  1. Say the hard thing. Be clear and specific.
  2. Be quiet and wait for the response.
    • You’re hoping they will say, you’re right. What can I do to improve?
    • It’s also possible they will be super angry.
  3. If they’re angry… well, read on.

Let’s say in this case, Peter is really angry. so, you give him all the logic of why he got what he did, what the protocol was, and explain things in very detailed words. All better, right?

No. Not right.

When we’ve talked about the Change Curve with clients and students, we’ve highlighted that when people are angry, they simply can’t hear you. Your best bet is to simply listen and let them vent.

The simple act of Listening is respectful, engaging, and HARD. Often people are taken back by anger and feel attacked and tempted to respond in kind.

So our tip for you today, to help you metaphorically throw the bucket of water at the anger, is the LESTER tool.

LESTER

LESTER is a great mnemonic to help you remember the steps when being confronted with anger in the workplace.

  1. Listen: Take a minute to breathe, and then just listen. Let the person vent, ask them clarifying questions, maybe even use “Tell Me More,” and listen. Really listen. Be engaged and be present. (Peter, tell me what’s got you so upset.)
  2. Echo: Clarify what you heard them say. It’s possible that, from all the venting, you will pull out the wrong issues or misunderstand what Peter said. (Ok Peter, it sounds like you are frustrated about the amount of your pay raise, and also – maybe even mostly – a little surprised by it. Have I got that right?)
  3. Sympathize: (Or perhaps Empathize, which messes up the mnemonic, but whatever…) Recognize their frustration. Tell them you can see their anger. Do NOT say “I’m sorry you feel that way,” which is passive aggressive and only makes people feel worse. Just let them know that you heard them and you can understand that they are upset. (Well I can see that your upset, and I can imagine how frustrated you must feel.)
  4. Thank: Yup, that’s right. Thank them for letting you know. It’s as simple as saying, “thanks for coming to me.” This ensures that people will continue to come to you, which is what you want as a manager. It’s way better than having people complain about you at the water cooler. The only thing that does is ensure you never have your finger on the pulse of the team. (Thanks for coming to me. I appreciate it.)
  5. Evaluate: Now you want to work on solutions to the problem. It might mean you change a decision or a policy, or it might mean that you discuss things in advance, or it might mean working on ways for Peter not to be so surprised in the future. (Well, let’s talk about how to make sure you’re not taken by surprise next time. You know the pay cycle and the policy for it. How can we work together so that you get what you’re expecting?)
  6. Resolve: This final step is just about repeating any agreed on actions as the person walks out the door. (So what we are going to do is set quarterly reviews to talk about your performance. You’re also going to work on your report-writing skills, and I’m going to set you up with some job shadowing. Sound good?)

This whole conversation can happen in five minutes. The more you practice, the easier it gets not only to avoid escalating, but also to actually de-escalate and build the relationship.

Give these tips a try, let us know how it went on Twitter at @whiteboardcons and check out the rest of our podcast series on our homepage at www.whiteboardconsulting.ca.

Until next time,

Ruth.

Why Context Is Critical to Success

A few weeks ago I spent a wonderful week at my cottage north of Toronto with a really good friend and her awesome kids. We had the best time splashing in the lake, exploring the local town, heading to the beach, eating, sleeping, playing Scattergories, colouring, and just chilling out.

I particularly enjoyed it because it was my first real downtime in a while – even when I’ve been at the cottage other times this summer, I’ve been working on it, readying it for rent through a shared rental service (something I started this year in order to cover rising operating expenses), and not simply enjoying it.

One of the things you have to do when you rent through a third party is to take extra care when preparing the space. This means you don’t just clean and tidy – you fluff pillows, you fold a bright and cheerful dishtowel over the edge of the sink “just so,” you wash the floors, you make smart “hotel corners” on the bedsheets, and you ensure the faucets are sparkling. Why? Because you want that coveted 5 star rating, which will get you more renters.

I have an amazing team who usually looks after this for me, so it was with some dismay that I found myself reverting to my picky nature when tidying and cleaning before my friends and I left to return home.

At one point everything was pretty much done, save cleaning out the fridge and taking out the trash. On my way to the kitchen I walked by the living room and nodded with satisfaction when I saw the blankets properly draped, the pillows smooshed just right, and the magazines fanned out nicely. Then, a few minutes later I walked by again and noticed, to my dismay, the kids flopped out on the sofa and rooting through the coffee table for the colouring book and crayons.

My reaction? Frustration/annoyance/panic (I had to be out by a certain time that morning.)

I did NOT say what first popped into my head. I ended up saying “If you kids mess this up, I’m going to end up cleaning it using YOU as a mop!” This sounded dumb, and elicited giggles, thank goodness. Then I took them on a walk up the driveway to water the flowerpots and look for bears.

And this applies to work how?

Here’s the thing. I believe I was annoyed because “those kids don’t have a clue how much work it is to prepare for the guests! If only they knew!”

If only.

Why didn’t I take the time that day to explain what was going on with all the hustle and bustle and why it was important? I bet they would have not only understood, but offered to help.

The same thing can happen to any leader at work.

We keep things from people because

  • we don’t think they care to know,
  • we don’t think they need to know,
  • we don’t realize they want to know.

I believe most of the time we don’t realize they want to know.

A few years ago I was talking to my team about the upcoming budget requisition season. I launched in to the savings we had to find and how we would work those savings into this year’s process. A couple of people were not paying attention, and I started to get annoyed, but I didn’t say anything.

Later, there were a couple of screw ups. Nothing awful, but to me they seemed obvious and avoidable.

When I met with the team and we talked about what happened and what we could do differently next time, one person spoke up and said, “Ruth, I think it would help if you explained how the whole budget process works. Some of us just don’t know.”

You could have knocked me over with a feather.

Of course they need to know! If they don’t know, how can they understand why the little things are important, which things need to be prioritized, where to get details, and why they should be concerned with the outcome.

Tell the story.

In the absence of information we make things up, and without the right context, we can’t expect everstoryyone to do their best work. It’s up to you to provide the back story and to not just drop people into Chapter 13, expecting them to know how you want the story to turn out.

If you’re seeing spotty results, can you look back at your communications to people and determine whether you started at the beginning of the story?

Some people have been reading the book along with you, and some haven’t. The effective leader knows the difference and covers both situations.

Until next time,

Ruth.

 

Why Leaders Should Download PokemonGo.

What the &$^# is a Pikachu?

It started with a few photos on Facebook.  Cartoons and acquaintances of mine were popping up in photos together on my newsfeed.  I figured it was random or a super geeky thing I didn’t need to know about and then the posts started getting more cryptic….friends were “hunting” Pokemon? Pokemon were screen-capped sitting on friends’ laptops and posted to social media and I was very very confused.

Even the University Health Network here in Toronto posted a chart on how to play safely. Wait what?

Then the naysayers started emerging. Nasty tweets and posts popped up about how stupid it was. While sending a text during my morning dog walk the construction worker doing road paving near my house said “Ugh.  Tell me you aren’t looking for Pokemon? That is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard of”.  News stories broke out about PokemonGo related injuries, accidents, along with the instant rise of Nintendo’s share price.

IMG_3076

My attempt at photographing Ruth holding a Zubat. 🙂

My husband came home that night, and described the concept.  “You walk around and there are things to collect and battle while you walk around.  And it is in real life. It’s weird, but kind of interesting, right?”

I thought, wow, I’m not really interested in phone games, but the concept sure does sound neat.

So I downloaded it.  Much like Snapchat I didn’t get it right away. (My good friend Jamie told me that it was so old people couldn’t figure out how to use it. Hmph.) But I figured a few things out. I caught a few Rattatats and Zubats.  Then Ruth downloaded it and we went for a little break.  We had quite a blast, and I learned a few things too!

So while I hate to admit it, it’s kind of fun.  It’s kind of social. It got me outside for a quick walk instead of glued to my laptop.

So why would a leader in an organization give PokemonGo a try? Shouldn’t we be keeping our minions in their offices doing work instead of looking for nearby Pokestops? I don’t think so. And here’s why:

3 Reasons Leaders Should Download PokemonGo

  1. It Will Help You Be Kind and Curious. Remember our famous coaching phrase? Kindness and curiosity leave no room for anger and resentment.  Instead of harbouring all that anger and resentment for those cute little cartoon characters, try playing it for 15 minutes.  If you hate it, at least you can say why and you can say you tried it, right? Get your kids to teach you, or get your employees to show you how it works.  They’ll get a kick out of it.  Trust me.
  2. You Will Find Something New to Talk about. Often when dealing with different generational types in the workplace, it’s hard to find some common ground in conversations. Instead of your team members jumping back to their desks and pretending to finish their TPS reports when they were actually out poke-hunting, you can ask them if they found that damn Zubat, and encourage them to relax. Start a conversation, ask them to take you for a hunt and show you how it works.  They will love getting to engage with you without having to have that same humdrum conversation about your weekend. (And they’ll respect you when you suggest it’s time to get back to work now.)
  3. It Will Help You Encourage an Active Work Culture. Maybe your office has a lunchtime plank session, or yoga class, or fitness or meditation group.  In large organizations that might be possible, but in smaller organizations it might be cost prohibitive to implement a large scale wellness program.  This is a great way to take 10-15 minutes out of your day, to get outside as a group, go poke-hunting together, and get some fresh air.

This all being said – boundaries are important. What I love about the UHN tweet is that asks people to be safe and considerate of others, but also jumps into the spirit of things and wishes players luck.  If you feel it necessary to set some boundaries in your organization, try to keep it firm and fun, instead of shutting the whole thing down and making people hunt in secret.

Tell us how PokemonGo is playing a part (or not) in your worklife. Tweet us at @whiteboardcons!

Until Next Time,

Nicole (@missNicoleNorth)

 

 

 

 

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